Friday, December 21, 2012

2012 (Roland Emmerich, 2009) Review

GET IT! BECAUSE IT'S A THING! END OF THE WORLD IS A THING SO IT'S THEREFORE RELEVANT! Don't worry, my caps lock isn't stuck, I'm just emphasising the point as to why I am reviewing this film. Because on this very day, we are all supposed to die but I cannot confirm this considering, you know, It kind of hasn't happened yet but hopefully by the time you read this, you'll know,.'ll either be alive or dead...screw it IS THIS A GOOD FILM OR NOT?! Let's find out!

Dr. Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor) has found that unpredictable solar storms are on the way which is causing the Earth's core to heat up. Helmsley warns the US President (Danny Glover) about the oncoming disaster and that they need to make preparation or else everyone will be killed in the disaster. Writer Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) learns about the news and that arks are being made to keep select humans safe. Jackson manages to convince his ex-wife (Amanda Peet), her boyfriend (Thomas McCarthy) and his kids to join him as he tries to escape across the world.

Well, guess what. It sucks. Yeeaahhh, this films REALLY sucks. Now I'm sure you all think it looks cool and, yeah, it does look pretty cool but that means nothing when the rest of the film is just bad. There are only a few engaging characters, it's predictable (what do you think happens to half of the characters. Go ahead, guess!) and was just use as paranoia fuel for people. The characters wouldn't be such a problem if they didn't focus on the one character who lacks any personality and the rest of the film just comes off as generic.

...any good points? Errrr, it looks good? Well, okay, I did say there were some characters I did like such as Jackson's ex-wife's boyfriend, Gordon, and Woody Harrelson's role...even though he was wasted on this film. Come on, this is the same guy that was in No Country For Old Men. That film was amazing and then we get...this film. Not a good step. Did I mention that I hate this film?

2012 is just a stupid film. The writing is crap and based on an uninspired event (THEY DIDN'T EVEN COME UP WITH ANYTHING!!!), the characters, for the most part, are generic and lack personality and the film is very predictable. Do yourself a favour and spend your supposed last day (which I still call 'bulls**t' on") watching a much better film. What film? ANY FILM!!!

A crap film. Predictable, poorly written, uninspired and full of underdeveloped characters. Sure, it looks cool but looks aren't everything if everything else know, bad.

The world better not end. Why?
I just wanted to say thanks and I hope we're not dead....doesn't seem like it so far though so....yeah....

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